I have an answering machine in my car. It says I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when Steven Wright Quotes
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I have an answering machine in my car. It says I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.

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I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.

I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.

I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to add to it.

I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to add to it.

Don't you hate when your hand falls asleep and you know it will be up all night.

Don't you hate when your hand falls asleep and you know it will be up all night.

If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light and you turn on the headlights do

If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light and you turn on the headlights, does anything happen?

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    The woman is at the heart of the home. Let us pray that we women realize the reason for our existence: to love and be loved and through this love become instruments of peace in the world.

    The woman is at the heart of the home. Let us pray that we women realize the reason for our existence: to love and be loved and through this love become instruments of peace in the world.

    If you have a sick or lonely person at home, be there. Maybe just to hold a hand, maybe just to give a smile, that is the greatest, the most beautiful work.

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