Douglas Adams

Life is wasted on the living.

I may not have gone where I intended to go but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.

There is a theory which states that if ever for any reason anyone discovers what exactly the Universe is for and why it is here it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another that states that this has already happened.

The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Don't Panic

Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly hugely mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean you may think it's a long way down the road to the drug store but that's just peanuts to space.

Writing is easy. You only need to stare at a piece of blank paper until your forehead bleeds

For a moment nothing happened. Then after a second or so nothing continued to happen.

Without a god life is only a matter of opinion.

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

The Answer to the Great Question Of.....Life the Universe and Everything.....(is) Forty-two.

The difficulty with this conversation is that it's very different from most of the ones I've had of late. Which, as I explained, have mostly been with trees.

Life is like a grapefruit. Well it's sort of orangy-yellow and dimpled on the outside wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside too. Oh and some people have a half a one for breakfast.

I seldom end up where I wanted to go but almost always end up where I need to be.

The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.

The moment at which two people approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway recognize each other and immediately pretend they haven't. This is to avoid the ghastly embarrassment of having to continue recognizing each other the whole length of the corridor.

He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.

The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.

Man has always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much...the wheel New York wars and so on...while all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man...for precisely the same reason.